Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Randomize
