Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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