shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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