I CAN MOONWALK!
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
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