Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
