well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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