My first STD was from a foam party
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
