why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
