He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
