Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
