no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
