I bet he comes in French.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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