All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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