Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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