i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
