You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
never play flip cup with pint glasses
this just has baby written all over it
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Randomize
