Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
