I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
