I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
