Screwed.edu
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
