so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
