dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
