Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize
