And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
