she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize