Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
