Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
