I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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