Non-Jews are for practice
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
