My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
