You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
