whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
