Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
