i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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