reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
