Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
