tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
