My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
