just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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