I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
