Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
