He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Welp...herpes.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Randomize
