we're blogging at a bar
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
