No, you can still breathe under the balls.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
What a dumb baby whore.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize