sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
