Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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