Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
