But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
