Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
