I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
