he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
