I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize